Planning Your Catholic Wedding
Choosing the form of your wedding
There are three different forms of the Rite of Marriage: the Rite of Marriage with Mass, the Rite of Marriage Outside of Mass, and the Rite of Marriage Between a Catholic and an Unbaptized Person. Which form is best for you, and what does each involve? Read on to find out.
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Who will preside at the wedding?
The decision about which form of the Rite of Marriage to use is ultimately up to your pastor, or the person who will preside at your wedding. However, if you have good reasons for preferring a particular option, let your pastor know.
This is a good time to consider who will celebrate your marriage. Most couples will be married by a priest, usually the pastor of their parish. However, that is not the only possibility:
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You may have your marriage witnessed by a priest other than your pastor, with your pastor's permission. Getting permission from your pastor probably will not be a problem; getting another priest to celebrate your wedding may pose more of a challenge, considering how busy and overworked most priests are these days. This option will work best if the other priest is a close friend or relative.
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You may have your marriage witnessed by a deacon—again, with the permission of your pastor. If you choose to celebrate Mass with your wedding, the deacon may witness your marriage but a priest must celebrate the Mass.
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You may have your marriage witnessed by a priest or deacon, and invite the minister of another faith to participate in the ceremony in some other way (special blessings or prayers, for instance). Ministers of another faith may not witness the exchange of consent ("vows") at a Catholic wedding, however.
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You may have your marriage witnessed by the minister of another faith, if you first obtain a "dispensation from canonical form" from your bishop.
'No-hassle' Catholic wedding priest?
You may come across advertisements or websites for a "Catholic wedding priest" on the Internet. Such websites offer a "valid priest" for your Catholic wedding free from the "hassle" of the Church's requirements, such as the restriction on outdoor weddings. While these individuals may be authorized to witness a civil ceremony, they are not authorized to witness a valid Catholic wedding. The bottom line: in order to have a valid Catholic wedding, you must be married by your pastor or have his permission to be married by someone else.
Rite for Celebrating Marriage During Mass
The Rite for Celebrating Marriage During Mass is the preferred form of the Catholic wedding liturgy when both the bride and the groom are Catholic. The Rite of Marriage states that the celebration of marriage "normally should be within the Mass"; receiving holy communion together strengthens the couple's love, and lifts up all present into communion with Christ and one another (#6). The marriage covenant the couple make reflects the covenant that Christ established with us through his sacrifice on the cross.
Because this form includes both a Mass and the Rite of Marriage, it typically lasts between 45 and 90 minutes, depending on the length of elements such as the readings, homily, music, procession, and so on.
Some couples object to the length of the nuptial Mass. However, celebrating Mass with your wedding only adds about twenty minutes to your wedding ceremony (depending on the length of the Eucharistic Prayer and the number of people receiving communion). If celebrating the "communion" of your love for one another is worth thirty minutes, why not spend a little extra time to celebrate the communion of heaven and earth in the Eucharist?
You can review a detailed description of this form of the Rite of Marriage by clicking through to the Order of a Catholic wedding Mass.
Rite for Celebrating Marriage Outside Mass
The Rite for Celebrating Marriage Outside Mass is generally the preferred form when a Catholic marries a baptized person who is not Catholic (Rite of Marriage #8), although guidelines differ from place to place. A couple may celebrate their marriage during Mass with the permission of their pastor, but this option is generally discouraged because the person who is not Catholic may not receive communion.
This form of the wedding liturgy generally lasts between twenty minutes (for a bare-bones ceremony) and an hour, depending on the length of elements such as the readings, homily, music, procession, and so on.
You can review a detailed description of this form of the Rite of Marriage by clicking through to the Order of a Catholic wedding outside Mass.
Rite for celebrating marriage between a Catholic and an unbaptized person
This is the form of the rite that is used when a Catholic marries someone who has not received Christian baptism; its wording and prayers are adapted to fit the circumstances. The order of this form is virtually identical to the order of the Rite for Celebrating Marriage Outside of Mass, as is the approximate length.
You can review a detailed description of this form of the Rite of Marriage by clicking through to the Order of a wedding between a Catholic and an unbaptized person.
Choosing Scripture readings . . .
Order for a
Catholic wedding during Mass
Step by step through a
Catholic wedding Mass.
Order for a
Catholic wedding outside Mass
Step by step through a
Catholic wedding without a Mass.
Order
for a wedding between a Catholic and an unbaptized person
Step by step through a Catholic wedding for a Catholic and an unbaptized
(non-Christian) person.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do we have to celebrate Mass during our Catholic wedding?
Other websites
Planning a Catholic Wedding
At
ForYourMarriage.org. A comprehensive overview of the Catholic wedding
ceremony, including an overview of your options for the various forms of
the wedding.
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